The lake

Driving home from daycare goes a little like this each day …..

[ our city is built around a small lake ]

‘Mum! Waadddaaaaa!!!’

Yes honey, that’s the lake!

‘No mummy. It’s wadda!’

All that water is what we call a lake.

‘NO. It’s wadda’

‘What dee-ing mummy?’

I’m driving

‘Ooooh. You diving?’

Yes. Mum is driving

‘Oooh.’

‘SCOO BUSS YEEWWWWOOOWWWW!!’

‘Hi city bus! Mummy, I go on city bus with Ryker and Manny!’

Yes you went on the bus to the museum with Ryker and Mandy.

‘RYKER! NO PITTING! NO SCEAMING’

Mah Woom

E is sitting on my bed while I get ready.

One of the cats casually walks out of her room.

‘Que mah woom!’

Yeah Que was in your room. He was in the window.

‘NO. Que Out mah woom. NO go mah woom!

*second cat goes into her room.

‘Wasco! Get out mah woom!’

Go do something about it then.

*E hops off the bed and charges the cats.

‘Out maaaaahh wooooomm!’

‘Hi Ganny!’

Well that’s how the morning started

Sh*t my kid says

So I’ve decided to turn this into a daily dose of sh*t my kid says.

So without further ado

‘Mummy, I go see Ryker?!’

Yes, you’re going to daycare to see Ryker.

‘Mummy, I go see Manny?!’

Yes, you’re going to daycare to see Mandy.

‘But no Joni’

Why not Joni??

‘Cause Joni werking’

Honey, Joni works at daycare, you’re going to see Joni.

‘NO! Joni werking!’

Okay.

kids

It would be fun they said.

No one tells you that they can be secretly little demons in a pint sized form.

Seriously.

My kid went to daycare today in her pajamas. PAJAMAS! She woke up normally, in  relatively great mood, but all hell broke loose when I told her that I needed to change her diaper. Good lord. Who knew that taking off ones pajama pants would mean the end of the world as we know it.

So she went to daycare in her pajamas. Take that moms whose kids look like they’re in vogue magazine every minute of every day! Actually, there are no parents that are like that at our daycare and I am SO thankful for it. At least I got her hair brushed today so thats a win.

Then this morning I find out that my kid doesn’t like the fact that she is no longer the only girl in her toddler class. She and the other little girl don’t get along very well. I don’t know whether I should be proud because she wants to be the leader in things or be worried that she is potentially a bully to this other little girl. Maybe a little of both? They are only 2 after all, but it better to curb any type of bullying behaviors early in life. Time will tell, or daycare will tell me.

The other half of the demon in my child decided she wanted one specific headband with attachable clip in order to go to bed. Well, hell. Do you think I could find it before bedtime? Absolutely not. E went and hid it. In a jar of all places. In a freaking jar. Thank god I did find it because it was almost the apocalypse in my house. Once I handed it to her, it was like nothing was wrong. HOW DO TINY PEOPLE DO THAT!? Absolute meltdown to the happiest kid on earth in 2.6 seconds. Its fascinating, but exhausting. Oh boy is it exhausting.

Also, we had a dad win tonight!  I have spent the last week trying to find E’s Rapunzel doll to no avail. Dad found it tonight! Yay! Definitely a life saver when it comes to E wanting all thing “Jordyn” aka Rapunzel who she refuses to call Rapunzel. So Dad to the rescue by finding the doll under the couch, which I swear I looked under at least a thousand times.

I’ll just chalk all of my little Miss’ attitude and temperaments to the fact that she has four teeth coming in at once. Now her little symmetrical gaps will be filled in finally.

Yep.

That is why shes a pint sized emotional ball of fire mixed with more sass than I can handle.

(end note; she is my flesh and blood, of course she is all of that and a bag of potato chips)

Tuesday..again

Tuesday’s seem to be my favourite to post about. Who knew?

So I cant work today. (shucks, I know,but I literally have no work truck as the other Journeyman took it out of town). So I figure I would take the small human to daycare anyways and get some things done around the house.

Well I dropped her off at 8am this morning. It is now 9:50am. Only just got one load of laundry in. God damnit, I am a lazy fuck.

On the Bright side (why bright is capitalized I do not know. Deal with it) I did get my paperwork done finally. It was supposed to be handed in yesterday morning but, well, Mondays. Am I right? Ya, I am. I also had family in from Ontario all weekend so we spent their last day with them yesterday instead of going to work and daycare. Well worth it.

I have to laugh because my almost two year old wakes up at 6:45 yelling ‘Mummy!! Nuggoe!! Nuggoe mummy!’  Damn, I was hoping to shower while she slept. Never fails.

So I go get her from her crib, take her to my bed and the whole time she is saying ‘hi mummy.’ We lay down and she looks at me firmly and in this cheesy grin says ‘kisssseesssss!’ and pulls my face in to give me a kiss and then asks for a hug. She always says thank you after. So I mean, she’s polite at least. Must be doing something right. Makes up for letting her eat tostito chips and grapes for supper last night.

Then we start in on ‘momomoannnnaaaa’ until I turn on Moana. We watch this about 50 thousand times a day that I am almost sure I renamed her Hie Hie. Boy does she get upset when the coconuts steal him after he eats the Heart. ‘MUMMY TICKEN! HEART! BACK!’ so after I reassured her that they would get him back I go have a shower.

I come back to my room and this little cheeky, mischievous grin comes across her face and my thoughts immediately are ‘Oh God what did you do!’. I then hear a series of poots, toots and fluffs and her looking at me saying ‘Faahhhted!’ and giggles.

Why kids think bodily functions are so freaking hilarious is absolutely beyond me. Makes my day happier though, provided there are no explosions that go along with it.

Thats my Tuesday…..so far anyways as theres at least a days worth of laundry to do yet.